Held back

I got the idea of this post sometime ago while I was writing my English exam. Part of my portions was to learn the poem “Where the mind is without fear”. It was a really good poem and the lines I loved the most which were truest for me were the lines “where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls”. What I’ve understood by that is the narrow domestic walls are the mental restrictions we put up ourselves due to things like bigotry and what we’ve been taught to believe. Not all of us have open our minds yet. These lines were referring to how we divide ourselves, our world, our society based on caste, colour, race, religion, gender and sexuality.

The question asked me whether I thought we still live in a world like that and what the narrow domestic walls meant to me. I wrote what I just typed above (but more elaborately because I need the grades). But this post isn’t going to be about how “we are one” that’s something which is commonly preached and anything I say won’t be anything new (unless I’m out of ideas in which case I’ll probably write about it). I wrote what any equal rights activists speech would be and while I was writing I came to a point where I desperately wanted to write the word “sexuality”. I wanted to write about how people receive hate for being “gay”. I wanted to put the word “homophobia” alongside the “racism” “bigotry” and “sexism”. Why was I holding myself back?

This post is not about homophobia (Just like above- it would be what any LGBTQ+ right activist would say in a speech. I’ll write it when I run out of ideas again). I support gay rights 1001%. I think homophobia is a huge issue. So why did I stop writing my essay and wonder weather I should write that word?

Because it was considered taboo.

Because i couldn’t say anything related to that without people gasping, shaking their heads in disgust and quickly shutting me down because the mere thought of homosexuality shouldn’t have been crossing my mind.

I live in a sort of backward and developing country. These topics are not to be spoken of.

And that’s what this post is about.

When I could openly state the facts about how women still don’t have the same rights as men. When I could openly say how islamphobia is a problem because bigots and the narrow minded think that they all are terrorists. When I could say that black people are being discriminated and shot all because they skin has more melenin in it than a white person, why can’t I say that a homosexual is being bullied, Disowned, killed all because he chose- no. Not chose. All because he was born to love someone of the same gender?

And it wasn’t just homophobia. I couldn’t say anything about how women and children are getting abused. especially sexual abuse. In a rant about equal rights, I shouldn’t discuss the topics of things having to do with sex or love in my country. And it is not just my country. There are other backward countries with the exact same problem. 

This is not much of a problem in the country as a whole but it still is a problem in traditional households- the topic of love marriage and dating is considered taboo. So if straight love marrige will give your conservative aunt a nightmare, gay marriage is a pretty long shot goal.

But it isn’t. Supposed. To. Be. Like. This.

This is what this post is about. It’s about countries like mine where I’m not even talking about equality anymore, I’m talking about being able to get my voice heard. I’m talking about letting the words pass my lips without people staring at me worrying for my mental safety just because real issues concerning real people crossed my juvenile mind. So if homophobia is bad wherever you live, homophobia isn’t even thought about where I live. 

A homophobic American parent would be horrified because their child was born different. A normal non modern open minded parent here would be horrified that their child even knew homosexuality was a thing. The thought wouldn’t even cross their mind in their most fearful nightmares.

And imagine a kid in this country who didn’t even have the exposure we do and who had their exposure completely controlled by their parents. Imagine that kid not even knowing about homosexuality or the different genders then thinking to themselves why they feel like they were born in the wrong body and trying to convince themselves that their ever growing feelings towards their same sex best friend is purely platonic. And if they ever hear about the LGBT, it’ll be so brief and negative, they’ll think they have some sort of disorder. Oblivious to the millions of us out here who fight for rights openly, who are accepted, who live a happily ever after, and who are valid.

So I stand here for you…For the LGBTs in my country and other countries alike. I fight for you to be educated about people just like you. There are more just like you and you are not alone. You live underground not knowing the sun that shines about you brilliantly. Break the taboos. Let the words pass from our lips fearlessly and effortlessly. Let us talk. Let us think. Let us believe. Let us know.

Love is not taboo.